Friendship on an island

I am still enjoying tranquillity of the surrounding and the aloneness – I haven’t felt so much rested and relaxed for ages. Tomorrow I will go back home – if the wind is not too strong and so ferries will operate.

Yesterday an old and very dear friend Nado came to visit me at the camp. He leaves about 60 km away, in an old coastal town Zadar and is a professional musician, guitarist. On top of that he also manufactures most exquisite hand-made hard-wood electric guitars and electric basses one can imagine. Thought electric instruments, his guitars preserve the rich sound of the acoustic instruments – it is probably the wood he uses, but I believe it is definitely also the love he infuses into his pieces of art. Check it out.

Spending a couple of hours with him in an honest and easy conversation, about life, relationships and midlife crises, of course, filled me not only with a lot of warmth in my hearth, but also with a lot of thoughts about the friendship.

Nado and I have met 20 years ago in the military service – we were both sent to the same army unit in Montenegro. It was not the easiest time of our lives; however we became friends instantly and supported each other until the end of our terms. We even played together in the army rock and folk band.

We keep meeting each other every few years here and there, remaining open and supportive. I believe these are two crucial factors that transform a relationship between two individuals to what can be called a true friendship. Openness and mutual support.

I have once heard or read someplace that the proof of friendship is not that you are on-line non-stop with certain person, but that you remain open to that person even for decades if you do not see each other – and when you sit down again after all that time, the openness is there instantly, you just continue from the point where you have had paused, right on, no need for small talk, no need to introduce and test each other.

And the issue of the mutual support; I guess this is the feeling when I know I can ask for support whenever I need it and the other person will immediately respond, no question asked and without a moment of hesitation. To me it does not mean that I will be using this potential of friendship all the time – in certain friendship I actually never used it so far, I think – but just the feeling that this quality of the contact is present, makes the difference.

Just now, writing this I realized that I actually have a lot of friends like this around the world. Just knowing this feels me up with easiness, warmth