The other day my mother stopped by for a coffee and so me and Marjeta chatted with her for half an hour about this and that, a regular small talk. Then the topic about the events in Kenya emerged and we exchanged a few rather typical phrases about it: “Yeah, terrible, I mean, what people do to each other, really horrible and painful, yeah, well, yeah…” Took a couple of deep breathes and than followed the conversation to other topics, like weather, prices going up in supermarkets etc.
After a couple of hours, the realization caught up with me. It was so terribly easy. To just hide myself behind the justification: “Well, yeah, life is like this, what can you do…” and turn away. And continue living my cute little immaculate life, hidden in this sweet place… As long as nobody hurts me or my kids or my wife, I hear no evil and see no evil. Disgusting!
I do not see my relation to all the immense amount of suffering of individuals around the planet in terms of responsibility and guilt. This is quite debatable, I know, and I do not really care, to be frank. Is it my responsibility or not, what is my responsibility… Blah blah blah.
I can only relate to two things right now: what is alive in me NOW and what kind of person do I want to be.
What is alive in me now is a strong feeling that it is not right. It definitely does not feel right to deny it all. It does not make me feel more fulfilled and peaceful and happy, when I turn my gaze away. It does not meet my need for a meaningful life AT ALL!
And what kind of person do I want to be? How do I want to live through my existence? I definitely do not want to be a person who hides, ignores and does not care about other people’s pain and suffering. And I do want to be able to say something when my kids, in say 15 years, ask me: “Now, you smart-ass, have you ever done anything worthwhile in this regard?”
” PULITZER PRIZE ” winning photo taken in 1994 during the Sudan famine.
The picture depicts a famine stricken child crawling towards an United Nations food camp, located a kilometer away.
The vulture is waiting for the child to die so that it can eat it. This picture shocked the whole world. No one knows what happened to the child, including the photographer Kevin Carter who left the place as soon as the photograph was taken.
Three months later he committed suicide due to depression.
